Annoying Orange: He Will Mock You/Transcript

Orange: (beatboxing to tune of "We Will Rock You") Pu pu chi, pu pu chi.

Pear: (Annoyed) Please, stop doing that.

Orange: What's the matter, Pear? Don't you like my fresh beats? (laughs)

Pear: (groans) Hey, look! New fruits in the house.

(Dane puts the banana, lime, and coconut on the counter)

Banana: (Disgusted) What a dump!

Lime: (Confused) Whoa, where are we?

Coconut: (Displeased) We left the tropical island for this?

Orange: Aloha! Sounds like you guys aren't coconuts about your situation. (laughs)

Coconut: (Bothered) Hey, I'm the only coconut, pal.

Banana: (Matter-of-factly) Clearly, I'm a banana.

Lime: (Rudely) And, I'm a lime, you idiot.

(record scratches)

Orange: (Trying to clear things up) No, I just meant that--

Banana: What the heck is this goofball supposed to be, anyway?

Orange: (Annoyed) I'm not a goofball, I'm an orange.

Banana: (Sarcastic) Oh, sorry. (Returns to normal voice tone) What's this orange goofball suppose to be?

Coconut and Lime: (laughing)

Orange: (Angry) Hey!

("He will Mock You" music fades on.)

Pear: Uh, guys? I wouldn't make fun of Orange, if I were you.

Coconut: Why shouldn't we make fun of your friend?

Pear: Well, because......

Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow: He will, he will  mock you!

Lime: (Unphased) This guy? We ain't afraid of him.

Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow: He will, he will mock you!

Coconut: (Also unphased) Whatever, bring it on.

Orange: Buddy, you're a coconut, you got a hairy butt, hate to tell you that you're gonna be cracked someday, you got seeds in your face, you big disgrace, I'm surprised anyone likes the way that you taste.

Coconut: (Confused) What's that supposed to mean?

(Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow keep singing while Dane grabs the coconut, and cracks him with his hammer. Coconut screams)

Banana: Dah!

(Dane cracks the coconut open, and coconut keeps screaming)

Lime: (screaming in horror)

(Dane puts the coconut pieces in the blender)

Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow: He will, he will mock you!

Lime: (whimpers in fear)

Orange: ''Buddy, you're a lime, you're real small time, you're gonna get cut up and squeezed someday, you'll see all sorts of strife for the rest of your life, somebody should've warned you about... KNIFE!''

(Dane cuts Lime with Knife, and Lime screams)

Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow: He will, he will mock you!

(Dane puts the lime pieces in the blender)

(Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow sing while Banana talks)

Banana: (Unphased) Pfft, whatever. He can't hurt me. Nothing rhymes with "banana". (Tone of voice becomes slightly worried) Right?

Orange: Hey buddy Banana, you'll move to Havana and live in a cabana for the rest of your days, you're gonna love that place, have all sorts of space and nothing's gonna happen, you'll be totally safe.

Banana: (Hopeful) Hehe, really?

Orange: (Nonchalant) Nope, not really.

(Dane takes the banana, he peels Banana, and he puts him in the blender.)

Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow: He will, he will mock you!

(Dane closes the lid from the blender.)

Pear, Midget Apple and Marshmallow: He will, he will mock you!

(Dane presses the button, the fruits from the blender scream,' and they all get blended. The blender mimics the guitar solo from "He will rock you". Screen turns black, and the screen cuts into Dane putting the smoothie on the counter.)

Orange: Aloha! Who are you? I'd offer to shake, but I don't have any hands. (laughs)

Coconut: (Annoyed) You know exactly who we are.

Orange: Yeah, I don't know. I meet a lot of food in the kitchen. It all blends together. (laughs)

Lime: That's it! I can't take it anymore!

Orange: Ah, don't worry. You won't have to.

Banana: Why's that?

Orange: Mouth!

(Dane grabs the smoothie, the fruits screams, and Dane slurps it with a straw.)

Orange: Jeez, those guys aren't very smoothie. (laughs) Get it? Smoothie? (laughs) You're not laughing.