Annoying Orange 4: Sandy Claus/Transcript

Transcript
Orange: (Singing to the tune of "Jingle Bells) Jingle bells, Batman smells, I just crapped my pants. Oh, wait, I'm not wearing pants. (Laughing)

(Daneboe places a stuffed Santa doll on the counter by a Christmas tree) 

Santa Claus Doll: Ho! Ho! Ho!

Orange: Whoa!

Santa Claus Doll: Merry Christmas!

Orange: Who are you?

Santa: Why, I'm Santa Claus!

Orange: Santa Claus? Is that a fruit or a vegetable?

Santa: Ho ho ho ho ho ho! No, I'm a person.

Orange: You're kinda red. You could be an apple.

Santa: No! I bring presents to all the good children on Christmas.

Orange: Presents?

Santa: Why, yes!

Orange: I want $1,000,000,000!

Santa: That's a bit much, don't you think?

Orange: Uh-uh, I want $1,000,000,000 and a gallon of gas.

Santa: A gallon of gas?

Orange: Yeah, 'cause I'm running out of JUICE! (Laughing)

Santa: Oh.

Orange: (Still laughing) Get it? Juice!

Santa: Ve-very funny.

Orange: I'm an Orange.

Santa: I know.

Orange: Hey, Santa!

Santa: Yes?

Orange: Santa! Hey!

Santa: What?

Orange: Can I give you a present?

Santa: Well, I guess.

Orange: (Burps & Laughs)

Santa: That was very naughty!

Orange: Hey. Hey, Santa!

Santa: What?

Orange: Do you like to go to the beach?

Santa: Yeah. I guess.

Orange: Then I'm gonna call you Sandy Claus!

Santa: That's not my name.

Orange: (Laughing) Get it? Sandy Claus? (laughs) Oh, I "sleigh" me! (laughs)

Santa: Ho, ho, ho, very funny.

Orange: Hey! Hey, Sandy!

Santa: It's Santa.

Orange: Hey, Sandy!

Santa: It's Santa.

Orange: Hey, Sandy! Hey!

Santa: Santa!

Orange: Hey! Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?

Santa: No!

Orange: NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!

Santa: Please stop!

Orange: NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Orange: NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Santa: STOP STOP! OK!

Orange: (Stops screaming) Okay what?

Santa: You know, there are some naughty boys and girls out there, but you, you top the list. Who taught you your manners? (Orange frowns) Your not getting anything but coal in your sock this year!

Orange: Socks? How can I wear socks? I don't even have feet! (starts laughing)

Santa: Grrrrrrrrrr!

(The scene then cuts to a snowy background with Orange on the left on the top reading "Happy Holidays! Created by Daneboe". A rock band version of "Deck the Halls" plays. Orange and Santa are talking in the background.)

Orange: Hey. Hey, Sandy!

Santa: WHAT?!?!

Orange: Can you move over a little? You're giving me Claus-trophobia!

(Santa growls)

Orange: Get it? Claus-trophobia?

Santa Claus: Yes. Yes, I get it!

Orange: (At the end of the song) You're an apple!