(A light bulb flickers and Orange finds himself hooked up to a death trap)
Orange: Whoa! This isn't the kitchen. What's going on?
Jigsaw: (Voice only) Hello, Orange.
Orange: Hey, I know that voice!
Jigsaw: (Appearing on the TV screen) I was hoping you and I could play another game.
(Creepy music stops and the record scratches. The theme music begins to play.)
Orange: Yay! It's Emo Clown! Hey, are we gonna play Twister? That's my favorite game.
Jigsaw: No, Orange. The name of this game is Deathtrap.
Orange: Cool! What kind of deathtrap?
Jigsaw: I'm glad you asked.
Orange: Is it a water bed filled with piranhas?
Jigsaw: No.
Orange: Killer bees in a pinata?
Jigsaw: No, that one never works.
Orange: Oooh! Is it a drunk guinea pig with a chainsaw?
Jigsaw: What?
Orange: A drunk guinea pig with a chainsaw!
(The screen rolls to Charlie the Drunk Guinea Pig holding a chainsaw)
Charlie: DIE, YOU BLOODY PERVS! (laughs maniacally)
Jigsaw: No! How did that even get in here?!
Orange: Well? What is it?
Jigsaw: Oh Orange, don't you see? The deathtrap...is you.
(Orange is left momentarily flabbergasted as the title rolls. The creepy music starts up again.)
Orange: But I'm not a deathtrap. I'm an orange.
Jigsaw: No one has ever escaped me, except for you. That's why I have chosen you to become my apprentice.
Orange: Apprentice? Who are you, Donald Trump? (Laughs)
Jigsaw: No. Today, you will help me by annoying my victim to death.
Orange: What are you talking about?
Marshmallow: Whoa! Where am I?
Orange: Whoa!
Jigsaw: Hello, Marshmallow. Want to play a game?
Marshmallow: Oh, yes! I love games!
Jigsaw: Everyone loves games.
Marshmallow: And I love everyone! Yay!
Jigsaw: Yes. All right, Orange. You're time to annoy her to death has come. Now... begin.
Orange: Miss.
(Creepy music stops and the record scratches. The theme music turns on again)
Jigsaw: No. Begin!
Orange: Nope! My turn! B2!
Jigsaw: What?
Orange: B3?
Jigsaw: No!
Orange: B5!
Marshmallow: Hey, you sunk my Battleship! (giggles)
(Orange laughs)
(Jigsaw sighs angrily)
Orange: Hey! Hey, fluffy face! You look like a mini pillow! (Laughs)
Marshmallow: Yeah? Well, you sound like a chipmunk riding a rainbow. (Giggles)
Orange: It's funny 'cause I do. (laughs)
Marshmallow: (giggles)
Jigsaw: Everybody, shut up!
Orange: Jeez! Who cut off Jigsaw's funny bone? (laughs)
Billy: Don't annoy me! Annoy her!
Orange: (Singing to the tune of "This Old Man") I'm an orange. You're a mime. Jigsaw's so boring, it's a crime.
(Marshmallow laughs)
Billy: That's it! I see my apprentice requires for the training. Let this be a lesson, for both of you! (He presses the red button on a remote)
Marshmallow: (As the saw on top tries to slice him in half) WHOOOOA!!
Orange: No! Not squeaky fun guy!
Marshmallow: Oh. That tickles! (Laughs)
Orange: (Laughs)
Billy: Stop laughing!
Marshmallow: That tickles! (Laughs)
Orange: (Laughs) Donald's gonna take another stab at it!
Billy: Come on, you stupid thing! (He keeps pressing the button, trying to activate the deathtrap)
(Marshmallow laughs)
Marshmallow: Do it again! (Giggles) That tickles so much!
Billy: I knew it! I knew this wouldn't work! (Growls) Orange, you're fired!
Orange: Wow, you really are the Donald! (Laughs)
Billy: And you, Marshmallow, you're roasted! (He presses the button and Marshmallow catches on fire)
Marshmallow: WHOOOOOOA! I feel all gooey! (Laughs)
Orange: Marshmallow, you're a real hothead now! (laughs)
Marshmallow: (giggles)
Billy: STOP LAUGHING!
Marshmallow: Whoa, you really lit a fire under me! (Laughs)
Orange: Hey, stop it, Donald! I don't think he can take any "s'more"! (Laughs)
Billy: That's it! I'm out of here! I can't take it anymore! (T.V. turns off) I need to get a new job...
Orange: Hey, where's Jigsaw going? We were just getting warmed up! (Laughs)
Marshmallow: (Laughs)
(screen cuts to a graham cracker and a chocolate bar)
Graham Cracker: Well, thank goodness they scared that guy away. I didn't like where this whole thing was headed.
(Charlie appears)
Charlie, Graham Cracker and Chocolate: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!